The annual Red Cross Ball in Monaco was held last night: scene of Stephanie's superhero attempt last year, scene this year of Princess Charlene's Grand Debut. Let's investigate...
She tried, you guys. She wore a color! (Fuchsia, Akris, love it.) She wore the Ocean Tiara, just like she said she would...only she didn't wear it in her hair (not that she was expected to, but that's never stopped me from whining in the past), and the lines just do not go with that dress, and it most especially does not go with that tragic makeup job. Poor Charlene.
Best in Stephanie
On anyone else, this would elicit one of my tired drapery/bedding/lingerie snipes. But in this case: her cleavage is contained, her skin seems to be a slightly lighter shade than usual, and it's not a tinfoil dress mullet. Sometimes you have to judge things on the Stephanie Scale.
I know what's happening here. I've figured this one out. Here it is: Caroline's seen all the headlines about the supposed sad state of her brother's union, and she decided to take action. She thought she'd give the newlyweds a reprieve from the body language speculation by distracting everyone with this dress. They'll be so busy trying to figure out what in couture hell I've done, they'll pay no attention to Albie and Char! This is the sartorial equivalent of jumping up and down, waving your arms, and setting off fireworks. She's a fashion martyr. What a good sister, eh?
Best of the Rest
Look who else turned up: Melanie de Massy (left) looking slightly unfortunate in black, and her mother Elisabeth-Anne de Massy (center, the daughter of the late Princess Antoinette), lovely in blue. But as with the wedding, the Wittstocks (right) win this category. Charlene's brother Gareth and a lady that I have seen identified as his companion and sometimes as his fiancée were in attendance, both looking dashing.